#also lol that big ass rip in the tights shirt lowkey i have to pull it down cause otherwise it sits RIGHT on my nip lol

[loverboybitch]

sorry wait im actually so pretty today (feat. boilerroom fit).//.

[seiyasabi]

Trouble In Paradise

(This is a Yandere Kyoutani x Cute Fem Reader x Yandere (Platonic) Older Bro Iwa-chan  fic :)) This takes place after high school, in a universe where everyone still plays volleyball. 

TW; Jealousy!, turns into dubcon/noncon!!!!, !unwanted choking!, As I’ve said in the past-every character I write for (in my head) are like two feet taller than you!, Possessive behaviour!, he’s highkey soft for u but is still a bastard lol (love him), marking kink!, creampie!, daddy kink!, mentions of Oikawa lowkey being a Yandere too, etc.. 

Kyoutan deserves the world ;)) I love him ajadskhafkah also, sorry if my use of ‘chan’ is cringey, I think it’s funny af tbh, and since I’m Japanese, I’ll do what I want lmao. Anyways, sorry if this sucks, I tried like 5 different ways to write this, and this was the only one that ended up being somewhat decent. ) 

Skipping to the loud gym, your skirt swishes against the fat of your thighs. Your cute ass can be seen peeking out from under the pleated fabric, leaving those around you to coo at your pretty self. Without meaning to, you catch the eye of those around you. 

Seeing the gym’s doors, you push them open with an excited vigour, happy to finally be with your big brother and boyfriend. 

Immediately when you enter, you see Oikawa being swarmed with his fanclub, leaving a straight shot to the rest of the team. Spotting your bad-boy bf, you squeal in delight, gunning at him at top speed. He’s currently sitting on the bleachers, your brother seemingly scolding him for his RBF and bad attitude, but his eyes snap up in an instant, recognising your voice from anywhere. 

An uncharacteristic smile is present on his pierced face, standing to his feet, he readies himself to catch you and twirl you around. That’s a plus of being in shape; picking up your supes cute gf whenever you please! 

That is, until a certain pretty boy steps in the way. 

Tooru has his arms out, in a stance that will allow him to catch you with ease. Before you could slow down and avoid him, he yoinks you up and off of the floor, holding you in a tight embrace, “(Your Name)-chan! I knew you’d come visit me! I’ve been waiting all day for you, Cutie!” The glares from your boyfriend and brother are instantaneous. 

Iwa looks ready to scalp the brunet, whilst Ken looks ready to scrap-possibly even catch a body. Oikawa’s fans look absolutely bloodthirsty, jealous of your cute self being in the arms of the equally cute male. 

Pouting, you push at the pretty boy’s chest, “Put me down! I’m not here for you!” He coos at you, moving in to kiss you on the cheek, only for you to push him away by his face, “Stop it, you’re being weird! Put me down, I wanna see Ken-Chan!” 

By this point, your boyfriend and brother have made their way to you, ready to rip him to shreds, “Put my sister down, Shittykawa! Don’t be a perv!” He karate chops the starlet on the head, causing him to drop you in surprise. 

“Iwa-Chan! You’re so mean to me! Now look what you did, (Your Name)-Chan is hurt-” Kentarou catches you in an instant, cradling you in his scarred arms. Oikawa’s mouth gapes in shock, brain not computing the fact that the dyed haired male moved at lightning speed. 

“No, she ain’t,” He gruffs out, smooching you on the cheek. You giggle, hugging the tatted male tightly. Your (size) breasts smoosh against his buff chest, as you start to pepper kisses all over his face, “She ain’t ever gettin’ hurt if I’m here,” He places a kiss on your lips, relishing how you immediately kiss back. 

“Ken-Chan! I missed you so much!” He rolls his eyes, the tips of his ears turning red. Readjusting his hold on you, he cradles your ass instead of your thighs, causing you to gasp, “Kyoutan, don’t be a perv!” 

He smirks, readying himself to respond, only for your brother to beat you to it, “Yeah, ‘Kyoutan,’ don’t be perving on my little sister!” Redirecting his smug look, he sticks his tongue out at your fuming sibling. 

“Bite me.”

The look on Hajime’s face is priceless, “Biting you isn’t the only thing you need to worry about-” 

“Haji,” His attention immediately snaps to your sweet face, which is currently pouting, “Don’t threaten him! He’s precious to me!” Before Kyoutani can say something smart, you rest your head against his neck, practically nuzzling him, which also shuts him up. 

The spikey haired ace is immediately offended, “I-wha-(Nickname), aren’t I precious to you? Aren’t I your most wonderful older brother?” You giggle, nodding your head. 

“Yes! But Ken-Chan is baby-”

“(Nickname)-Chan, aren’t I baby?! I feel so left out!” Oikawa and his fangirls are off to the side, watching the interaction. Whilst Oinks looks positively offended and left out, the girls are angry that you’ve stolen the captain’s attention. 

“No, you’re the ugly side character,” Hajime states nonchalantly. 

“Yea, yer uglier than the dirt under (Your Name)’s shoe,” Offended noises and indignant hand movements follow their words, as his fans start to shout in anger and shock. 

You lightly whack Kyoutani on the shoulder, scolding him with your eyes, “Haji, Kyoutan, don’t be mean! Tooru is pretty,” The setter preens in delight, “But, he’s dumb. So, he’s the dumb, but pretty, character!” 

His hands grasp his chest as if you’d stabbed him, “(Nickname)-Chan, my heart, it’s breaking-” He fake gags, causing your brother and boyfriend to roll their eyes, “The only way to fix it…. Is to get a kiss!” He bolts towards you, causing you to shriek in surprise. Placing you on your feet, you’re quickly placed behind the dyed haired man, ‘Mad Dog’ making an appearance. 

Practically frothing at the mouth, he snarls at Oikawa, whilst Hajime sticks out his foot, effectively tripping him. Once falling, the pierced male yanks him up by his shirt collar, and hauls him up to his feet. Now face to face with the scary male, Oikawa gulps in fear, “I’ll kill ya, put ya in the ground, Pretty Boy. Once yer dead, Iwaizumi’ll dance over yer corpse.”

“Yes, I think I will,” Hearing his bestie agree with the sentiment, Oinks finally realises that he messed around too much. 

“Now, yer gonna apologise to (Your Name), or I’ll shave yer head,” Now fully standing, Kyoutani moves out of the way, allowing the setter to apologise face-to-face. 

Dropping to his hands and knees, he starts to bow at you as if you’re royalty, “I’m sorry, (Your Name)-Chan! I promise I didn’t mean to offend you! Please don’t let Mad Dog-Chan and Iwa-Chan kill me!” Giggling at his over the top words, you nod your head. 

“It’s okay, Tooru-Chan,” You pat his head reassuringly, “I know you love your fangirls more than me,” This causes the gym to erupt into cheers, as the other girls start to swarm the male. You can hear him scream in fear, but are quickly pulled away from the crime scene, and taken out to the car park. 

Your brother holds you close to him, glaring at your boyfriend who looks equally as angry. There’s a heavy silence between the three of you, as you’re squished into a hug by your brother. 

“Haji, why’re you holding me so tight? Don’t you have to get back to practice?” He doesn’t answer, instead speaking to your boyfriend. 

“Take her home, Kyoutani. I’ll deal with him now, you can deal with him later,” He nods, taking you from your older brother’s arms, and practically carrying you to his motorcycle. Setting you on the back of the bike, he opens the back hatch of the bike, and pulls out your pastel pink helmet. Placing it onto your head tenderly, he flips the eye cover up, allowing you to see him clearly for a moment. 

Smiling up at him (he can only see your eyes crinkle), you speak, “Hi!” His pissed off face immediately dissolves, causing him to smile at your cute self. 

“Hi, Baby,” Grabbing his rough hands, you interlace your fingers between his. 

“Aren’t you going to practice, Kyo-Ken?” He rolls his eyes, but gives your hands a squeeze. 

“Nah, I gotta take my Baby Girl home, so I can show her who she belongs to,” He gives you a wink, leaving you to splutter in surprise. 

“You-you can’t say that in public!” Chuckling, he releases your hands and flips your eye cover down, before chucking on his own helmet, and settling on the front of the bike. 

Pulling Your arms around his waist, he waits for you to settle against him. He relishes your tight hold, as you practically cling onto him for dear life. 

Starting up the engine, he kicks up the kick stand, and speeds off to your shared apartment. 

-

Your body bounces off of the mattress, as you let out a small scream. A giggle escapes your lips, as you smile up at Kyoutani, “Ken-Ken, are you still mad?” He nods, his hands pulling off your cropped sweater, and pushing up your skirt to expose your pastel yellow panties. 

“That ugly bastard should’a know better than t’a put his disgusting hands on ya,” He practically growls, undoing your bra and letting your pretty tits flop out. Kissing up your neck, he sucks hickies onto the previously unblemished skin. A small moan leaves your lips at the feeling, as he starts to pinch and twist your nipples. 

“Daddy!” He releases your neck with a ‘pop,’ smirking down at you. 

“Yes, Princess? Do ya need something?” He rubs the skin on the inside of your thighs, purposefully missing your dampening cunny, “Do ya need yer Daddy to touch yer Princess parts?” 

Nodding, you plead with him, “Yes! Please touch me!” 

Chuckling, he pulls your panties off of you, letting the cool air of your shared room caress your cunny. Running a single finger up your slit, he barely taps your clit, causing your hips to jerk up and off of the mattress, “Yer such a sensitive baby, I love ya so much.”

“I love you too, Daddy! Please fuck me!” He hums, mulling over your words. 

“Want me to show everyone who ya belong to?” You nod your head rapidly. 

“Yes! Yes, please!” Kissing you on the lips sloppily, he reaches down to pull out his cock from his Adidas sport shorts. His tip is pierced, and when he rubs it against your clit, you practically see stars. 

“My good, cute, polite girl,” He gathers your slick on his tip, before he pushes in. Your walls burn as you try to accommodate to his thick size, practically sucking the air from your lungs. A wanton moan is heard from you, as he waits for you to accept him comfortably, “Relax, Princess. Let me int’a yer pretty cunny.” 

“Da-Daddy,” Your arms wrap around him, clawing at his shirt covered back, “You’re too big!” He shushes you softly, rubbing your clit with two fingers. Your juices slowly drip out of you and onto his cock. After a moment, he begins to move, practically rearranging your guts. 

“You’ve taken me before, Princess. I know ya can do it, just let me in,” He starts to thrust into you at a medium speed, rubbing your clit at the same pace. Your eyes glaze over, practically rolling into the back of your head. 

His cock is heavy and girthy inside of your slick walls, spearing you open with each thrust. Moans and keens leave your throat, as you grip onto him. Your hips meet his, your juices spraying onto the both of you. 

“Look at my pretty baby, so fucked out already,” He uses the hand that’s not on your clit to grasp your throat, causing your body to go rigid and eyes to go wide. 

“Ken-” He shuts you up with a kiss, swallowing your words. You try to push his hand off, but it’s to no avail. He continues to fuck into you, your cunny still sucking him in, even as you’re scared of his actions. 

“Fuck, yer practically milking me for all I’ve got,” He removes his lips from yours, his grip becoming a bit tighter, “Ya want yer Daddy to cum in ya? Yea ya do.”

Now, you’re really pushing against him. You’re not on the pill, “Ken, pull out!” He shushes you, rubbing on your clit even harder than before, trying to make you cum before him. Kentarou relishes the small tears at the corner of your eyes, loving how cute you look. 

Without you wanting to, you cum with a small gush of liquid, a whine echoing through your chest. He follows not long after you, filling you to the brim with his virile cum. 

With a grunt and a huff, he pulls out of you, loving how his cum looks leaking out of you. Removing his hand from your throat, he looks down once more, realising that you don’t look very happy. 

“You didn’t listen to me,” You rub the hand mark around your neck, as you sit up, moving away from him. 

“Awe, don’t be like that, Baby,” He reaches out for you, but you move away from him. 

“I don’t want to be near you right now, Kyoutani. You didn’t stop…” Moving off of the bed, you stand to your feet. Going to your dresser, you grab a week’s worth of clothes, including your work uniform. Pulling on a new shirt, you fix your previous outfit, as you start to cry. 

“Wait-I-ya-ya aren’t leaving me, are ya?” For once, the spitfire male is at a loss for words. 

“No, I just need time away from you. You say that Tooru is bad, but you hurt me a lot just now. I’m calling Haji, and I’m going to stay with him for a little while,” Your brother has your daily items there, just because you’d sleep over sometimes, so you aren’t too worried about not having soap and such. 

Grabbing your phone from your purse by your bedroom door, you call him, Ken watching you with wide eyes, “Haji, please pick me up. Kyoutani and I got into a fight.”

-

Hajime helps you into his car, before turning to the still shocked male you call your boyfriend. He hasn’t said a word, if anything, he looks shocked beyond anything else. 

Shutting the car door, your brother finally speaks, “I knew you were no good for her. Your jealousy got the better of you.”

“I didn’t mean to, it-it just-”

“Got out of control?” Your brother raises an eyebrow, arms crossing over his chest, “Yeah, I’ve noticed. You hurt my little sister,” He moves closer to the dyed haired man, eyes flashing with anger, “You choked her out. Why? Because Oikawa made you jealous? Despicable.”

“It isn’t like that! We-we were having se-” He holds up a hand, stopping your boyfriend from continuing. 

“I don’t want to hear it. Just know that if you come near her without her allowing you to be in her presence, I’ll kill you. I never wanted you to be with her, and you just proved my fears correct.”

Realisation dawns on Kyoutani, “Wait- is this why ya wanted me to come home with her? So I could fuck up?” 

Hajime smirks, “Of course. My little sister is too good for you. Now, fuck off, before I do something you won’t like.” 

Ken watches as you go, tears brimming his eyes. He should’ve known your brother would find you too precious to be with him. He most likely asked Oikawa to help him, seeing as the pretty boy was in the car with you, looking as perfect as ever. 

He fucked up, and now Hajime has won their rivalry. 

[haruki-ya]

Precious Equilibrium

Summary: Tetsuo has always looked to Kaneda for comfort. Largely because Kaneda knows him well enough to give without having to be asked. Similarly because he knows what Tetsuo needs when he himself doesn’t. 

A/N: Fair warning, this is p gay. It’s more subtle than anything honestly, maybe lowkey unrequited but you gotta look deep into the parallels here....fridge you know what I’m talking bout. Also, continuity?? From movie, manga, or even in reference to my other story which this is picking up from? ? Yeah none of that here lol  

Tetsuo is bored.

From the open window of Kaneda’s flat, he can hear the distant rumble of cars in the street below. The synthetic voice of a holo-advertisement programmed to drone on about tonight's special lottery wins has talked through its fifth cycle. Footsteps are pacing on the floor above him.

A fly buzzes by his ear.

How annoying.

The old woman in the apartment parallel fell asleep with some gaudy soap opera on her giant T.V., a cheesy melodrama that Tetsuo can imagine Kai and Kaneda would find entertainment in assigning character backstories and devious plot twists while watching through her window. Tetsuo can all too vividly imagine his own brain melting if he watched anymore than he sees through darting glances.

If it isn’t already melted, that is.

He’s been staring at the ceiling for an awfully long time now.

Kaneda has gone to fetch bandages, clean ones to change the wrap around Tetsuo’s head which pulses in time with his heartbeat, aches something fierce that even the two capsules Kaneda had begrudgingly forked over doesn’t mask.

His eye twitches thinking about a brain aneurysm, blood clot, tissue damage. Maybe he’s dying, but honestly he’s probably okay (if he ever has been okay.)

There’s an unfamiliar feeling in his body though, something new but not quite foreign. Like a cold: his body is thrown out of homeostasis, navigating a new set of conditions. Only slightly different than normal. He really doesn’t know how to explain it, tried as much with Kaneda and ended up being laughed at.

Whatever. He’s too stupid to understand anyhow.

Tetsuo doesn’t feel quite right though and it really isn’t due to a cold at all. It’s probably not the pills either.

It’s an airy, weightless feeling, something similar to free falling. Like balancing carefully along rusted support beams of a felled building in Old Town, one step away from a fatal fall. Or riding passenger on Kaneda’s bike, arms wrapped tight around a strong torso. Hitting max speed, a higher high than any pill could hope to achieve.

That thing really rides like the wind.

If Tetsuo closes his eyes, he feels like he’s spinning, like the world is falling away around him and opening up into this vast empty place in his head, a previously inaccessible space that speaks to him in nonsensical images.

Akira, his mind tells him, but honestly who the fuck is that?

Maybe he shouldn’t have drank those beers Kaneda offered. He’s usually smart enough to avoid the consequences of mixing booze with pills on an empty stomach, but tonight he’s a little too much of everything (anxious stressed upset scared) to really care about how his body will react, about what kind of weird places his mind will travel to under their influence.

Akira, sure. Whatever. Just a name, nothing more. A name that vaguely rings a bell in the back of his mind though.

Tetsuo doesn’t care to try and figure out why.

Right as Tetsuo is about to push up off of Kaneda’s bed and move into the living room, maybe check out those mags he saw Kaneda hide under his jacket earlier out of sheer boredom, Kaneda bursts through the doorway in a flourish.

In one hand he holds a crumpled wad of thin wrapping bandages and a packaged gauze pad. In the other, a big bottle of chilled Lager. There’s a sly smile on his face too, eyes bright with excitement. Tetsuo perks up at that and maneuvers into seiza.

“Man, you won’t believe who Daichi was bangin next door! I coulda sworn it was Haruko since they’ve been goin’ steady for a while, or well, not anymore, but he has Satsuki Nakamura screaming his name to the high heavens! Whatta dog that guy!”

Kaneda plops down on the bed next to Tetsuo and throws the materials in his lap. He naturally has a bottle opener within a foot of his person at all times and is quick to pop the cap and take a long gulp. Kaneda offers it to him after he belches loudly, gross, but Tetsuo simply pulls a face and starts opening the gauze pad instead.

“Satsuki from math?” Tetsuo asks idly, because he thinks Yamagata used to have a thing with her. It was fleeting, more a one night stand than anything, nowhere near as meaningful as the looks Tetsuo has caught him sending Kai. He practically eye fucks him across the bar at Harukiya’s and Kai just kinda plays dumb about it like he doesn’t know when they all know.

He’s really not surprised about those losers, they have a lot of history.

“Yup, the one with the blonde hair and huge ass. Man...what I wouldn’t give to spend a night with her.” Kaneda sighs dreamily, a lost look on his face as he crosses his arms behind his head and settles down on the mattress, taps his foot to some unheard beat. Tetsuo scowls and rolls his eyes.

“Would you give up your bike?” Kaneda blinks and doesn’t even really seem to think about it before pulling a face.

“Hell nah. Her ass is nice but not that nice.”

“Right. That’s the only way you’d be able to give her a ride worth remembering anyway.” Tetsuo takes joy in seeing the dreamy look on Kaneda’s face drop into something similar to a pout.

He kinda missed Kaneda’s expressive face and exaggerated movements when he was at the hospital. Everyone was stiff faced and moved methodically, mechanically. He felt like he had been a test subject rather than a patient.

“Rude, Tetsuo. Anyone would be lucky to have a piece of this! You’re just jealous cause you can’t get anyone but that boring chick to look at you and see more than just forehead.” Tetsuo flushes and glares at Kaneda suddenly over the mention of Kaori (and his forehead too honestly.)

“Shut up.”

She’s sweet. She isn’t put off by him. She likes his company just as he likes hers. Just cause she’s a little more simple and shy than the loud girls Kaneda and the Capsules like and she never stays the night or asks him over to hers and they haven’t even kissed let alone fucked because she said she thinks she doesn’t like him that way and he’s strangely okay with that doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with her. Or him.

There’s definitely nothing wrong with him.

“You want me to see if Junko knows any girls desperate for a ride?” Kaneda’s voice is leering, lecherous, and Tetsuo’s flush burns hotter in his cheeks as Kaneda laughs loudly, a gleeful look on his face all at Tetsuo’s expense. He doesn’t like it.

Tetsuo rips off the bandages on his head clumsily and throws them at Kaneda, who yelps and moves out of their range. Which means he falls off the bed with a loud thump.

“Shut up!”

“Fuckin’ gross man!”

Kaneda climbs back on the mattress with a scowl after pushing the used bandages on the floor. Tetsuo turns away from him and tries to align the gauze pad over the deep cut on his forehead by touch alone. This leads to a lot of flinching and pain on his part. He can do this, especially without stupid Kaneda’s help. He doesn’t need a girl and he doesn’t need help.

Kaneda sighs after a moment of watching him struggle.

“Here.” Kaneda holds out a hand, probably for the gauze pad and medical wrap, but Tetsuo holds fast to them, keeps working on aligning the pad with his injury, using pain as an indicator of closeness so he must be pretty damn close.

“I got it.” His voice is flat and level. Kaneda clicks his tongue at him immediately afterwards.

“Dude, you’re like way off target. Ever heard of X marks the spot? Come on, lemme’ do it.” Tetsuo grits his teeth and continues to fumble with holding the gauze pad to his forehead while simultaneously trying to wrap the bandage around his head. He doesn’t need Kaneda’s help.

“I said I fuckin got it.”

His hair is getting in the way. His palms sweat. He can feel Kaneda’s eyes on him.

There’s a moment of silence between them, broken only by Tetsuo’s heartbeat echoing like a drum in his head, by the wail of a distant police siren in the night, by the sudden and very loud scream of Daichi’s name from the next apartment over.

Tetsuo’s hands start to fumble harder. The silence stretches on. He suddenly wonders what it would be like to hear someone call his name like that.

Tetsuo thinks of Kaori and then Kaneda and sighs out his nose sharply. His body feels drained all at once. Resigned.

He can still feel Kaneda’s eyes on him.

“...will you help me?” Tetsuo’s gaze is averted when he asks, and thankfully Kaneda doesn’t say anything annoying in response. Keeps his snickers politely muffled. Just holds out his hand again for the gauze and wrap and takes them easily from Tetsuo’s shivering hands. His head is really starting to hurt again. 

The pain ebbs and flows.

Kaneda scoots closer on the mattress until his knees are flush with Tetsuo’s thigh.

“Turn my way.” He says, easy as that, and Tetsuo naturally obliges.

Their knees touch before Kaneda scoots closer and brackets his legs around Tetsuo’s. His hand very suddenly pushes back the short fringe that hangs over his forehead and Tetsuo’s breath punches out of his chest in a shallow exhale.

Kaneda’s hand feels so good against his hot forehead. He nearly melts at the feel of it, so much more intimate than the clinical touches that linger in his mind from that cold, creepy hospital. Most of the visit was a blur, but he can’t get the sterile smell out of his mind. The faint beeping of machines and stiff, stark white lab coats. Waking up, alone, on an operating table. Tetsuo shudders.

Number 41? Fuck that.

“Man, you’re burning up. You been drinking water?” Tetsuo’s gaze has been fixed on the shallow dip in Kaneda’s collarbone peeking out from the lip of his thin shirt, but now he drags it up to trace along the planes of his neck and trail along the curve of his strong jaw. Tetsuo’s throat feels tight. He can’t quite meet Kaneda’s eyes.

“Didn’t know you had any, thought you lived off of beer.” Kaneda’s hand pushes through his short hair and his nails rake teasingly down Tetsuo’s scalp, along the back on his neck. His warm palm settles there comfortingly. Goosebumps dance along his skin and Tetsuo fights a shiver.

He closes his eyes and that airy feeling washes over him, makes him feel like he’s about to topple over right into Kaneda’s chest, maybe right through him. He swallows dryly.

Tries to think of Kaori.

“Not true. I live off soda too.” Kaneda’s voice is low and warm, sounding much closer than before. Tetsuo starts and opens his eyes, finds Kaneda just inches from his face, eyes squinted in concentration, trained on the gash in his forehead. Kaneda’s hand squeezes for a moment on Tetsuo’s nape and his stomach flips.

Tetsuo stares at the deep brown of Kaneda’s averted eyes. They carry just a hint of green in them, little smatterings of mossy freckles particularly dense around the iris. There’s a darker brown splotch near the pupil in his left eye, shaped almost like a star.

Tetsuo closes his eyes again and floats.

“Man those assholes at the hospital couldn’t ‘ave given you some painkillers or something? Did they say anything about risk of concussion? This looks pretty rough.” Kaneda’s fingertips ghost over the cut and Tetsuo twitches involuntarily at the pain that blossoms in their wake, at the flash of an image that bursts behind his eyelids for a split second, a blank face that’s not quite new, not quite recognizable…vaguely familiar.

“It doesn’t hurt anymore.” Tetsuo says, but the words don’t feel right in his mouth because he does hurt. Somewhere, somehow. A shameful ache in his gut often accompanied by a wholly pleasant flutter.

Triggered at the sight of red.

He doesn’t need a girl, but nothings wrong with him.

Kaneda makes a disbelieving noise, “Uh-huh sure”, and presses the gauze to his forehead, starts to carefully wrap his head up. Maybe keep it from falling apart (or be the reason it does). Something in Tetsuo wants him to wrap it tight.

When he stops feeling the rhythmic motion of Kaneda’s hands winding around his head, brushing carefully over his temples, he tentatively opens his eyes. Finds himself face to face with Kaneda, who is watching him intensely, something guarded and serious in his usually open expression. His head tilts. Tetsuo goes on offensive.

There’s always been something dangerous about Kaneda when his mind is set on something.

“Are you okay, Tetsuo? You’ve been acting kinda different lately. The boys have noticed too.”

Tetsuo’s mind flashes back to the past week, the past month, hell, the past year. A lot has happened, a lot has changed. Maybe he has too, but he’ll feign ignorance. There’s always a loophole in that attitude with Kaneda. He likes to believe that everyone is honest with him, something Tetsuo secretly thinks makes him weak. But maybe it makes him weak to be the only one lying. To be taking advantage.

“Of course I’m fine. I just got back from the hospital dumbass, they wouldn’t have let me go if I wasn’t okay.” And Kaneda squints his eyes as an easy smile spreads slowly to his lips. Tetsuo’s always envied those easy grins (always loved em’ more though.)

“Not what I meant. Yamagata thinks you’ve been quiet lately. I guess I’ve noticed it too if I’m being straight with you.” Tetsuo tilts his head back slowly and doesn’t respond. Kaneda waggles his brows, pats his thighs idly with his hands. Tries to keep this lighthearted. 

“You got somethin’ on your mind lately?”

Someone, he wants to say, I have someone on my mind lately.

That name once again comes to mind.

Akira.

“Nah, just the usual.” It’s a bullshit answer, he took too long to respond, a dead give away. And Kaneda sees right through it too. 

Tetsuo deflects with a yawn but he doesn’t have to lie about that, as a tiredness sweeps over him like a wave. Crashing from his busted head all the way down to his tingling toes. 

“Ok, ok, I see. Just the usual nothingness running through that empty skull of yours. No wonder they didn’t keep you longer for observation, you got no brain to worry about hurtin’.”

Kaneda often relents, but never shows mercy.

Tetsuo scowls and tries to swat at Kaneda, but he seems to see it coming from a mile away as he grabs Tetsuo’s arm and yanks it towards him with a shiteating grin. Tetsuo collides into Kaneda’s chest with an “oof” and almost head butts Kaneda’s chin as they fall back onto the mattress, Tetsuo’s body landing precisely within the valley of Kaneda’s legs.

A sharp pain stabs into his head abruptly and makes him clench his eyes shut, instinctively bury his face in the soft cotton of Kaneda’s shirt. He’s suddenly very dizzy.

Tetsuo’s groan is muffled into Kaneda’s rib cage, his arm tense within Kaneda’s grip. Kaneda makes a questioning noise and lets his arm drop, pokes softly at the crown of his head and begins to carefully massage at his scalp.

“Phantom brain pains? Can you feel hurt over something you never even had?” Tetsuo groans again and a pair of dull grey eyes glare in his mind.

Yes.

“No.” He says, but he doesn’t know who he’s talking to. Tetsuo opens his eyes. He’s starting to feel confused.

“Well hey, you said it man, not me.” Kaneda’s voice rumbles against his forehead and Tetsuo shifts his head so he’s looking up at Kaneda, chin digging into his sternum. Kaneda’s hand is warm on his head.

He’s crossed his free arm behind his head again and is staring up at the ceiling like Tetsuo had been not too long ago, looking strangely lost in thought. Maybe he’s trying to decide if that water stain on the ceiling looks more like a dog or a dragon.

Tetsuo bet’s he’s thinking dragon.

“Are you really worried about me?” He says, and his voice is low, quiet. Kaneda’s eyes don’t drift towards him, but his brows shift downward and his shoulders shuffle on the mattress. A dead give away. They know each others tells but make a game of keeping them secret anyway.

“Maybe. A little bit. But I know you’ll talk to me if you need to.” And there’s nothing more he says. No confirmation, no follow up, no ,“Right, Tetsuo? You can always count on me!”, because Kaneda knows that Tetsuo knows. Always has, always will.

Kaneda will have his back until the end. He knows that. Doesn’t listen to the part of him that’s always whispered it’s too good to be true. The little voice that’s been getting louder lately.

Tetsuo feels like he’s floating again, but it’s not a dizzying feeling this time and his eyes are open and all he sees is this stupid guy with his fast smiles and easy affection who can read him like an open book and make him feel better without even really trying.

“Hey, Kaori was askin’ around for you after the bell yesterday. You should really make a move before she gets bored of your boring ass.”

Tetsuo doesn’t want to think about Kaori right now. He doesn’t need a girl.

“Yeah. Okay.” Tetsuo says, and rolls off of Kaneda’s chest to lie on his back next to him: their sides are flush together and Kaneda radiates a comforting warmth that Tetsuo shifts into, his other arm a pillow underneath Tetsuo’s head. They lie in the quiet for a minute before Kaneda says, “Hey,”  leans down towards him with a smile that spells trouble and burps Tetsuo’s name loud and long right in his ear.

That starts a wrestling match that Kaneda was stupid to start because while Tetsuo’s head feels kinda hollow, his body relies on muscle memory for these games and there’s no Yamagata or Kai to play referee and keep either of them from fighting dirty.

Kaneda laughs the whole time they grapple, even after letting Tetsuo pin him down to the bed.

Tetsuo smiles triumphantly though, even knowing Kaneda let him win, and feels his stomach flutter at the look on Kaneda’s face. His grin is lopsided like he’s trying and failing to contain it, eyes bright with an emotion Tetsuo can only think to name as joy. His cheeks are flushed, his chest heaving, and Tetsuo suddenly becomes aware of all the many points of contact between their bodies.

Kaneda’s hand is on his chest, his legs and hips pinned between Tetsuo’s thighs, his other arm pressed down hard into the lumpy mattress. Tetsuo’s got Kaneda boxed in underneath him and his heart jumps into overdrive at the revelation.

Kaneda’s hips twitch a bit as if testing the weight of Tetsuo’s body against his, but his smile has turned teasing and his eyes...Tetsuo releases his hand instinctively and pulls back. He’s flustered by the change in demeanor and Kaneda is quick to take advantage of this. He fists his hand in Tetsuo’s shirt, drags him slowly down towards Kaneda again and his smile twists into something foreign as Tetsuo’s breath stutters, he stutters, his heart stutters. Kaneda’s hand tightens in his shirt slowly, his mouth curls into a soft, sweet thing, and then he pushes Tetsuo away and off of Kaneda completely.

Tetsuo flops down next to him, breath frozen in his chest, what the fuck, until Kaneda pulls him into a headlock and tells him in a sing song voice to say uncle. Tetsuo yells obscenities at him, “Let me go, you stupid fucking asshole!”, suddenly furious and flustered and all kinds of things that only Kaneda can make him feel.

Tetsuo eventually does say uncle.

Kaneda’s answering grin burns like fire.

It’s been a while since he’s stayed over and indulged in Kaneda’s childishness, played along with his dumb, immature jokes and jibes. Kaneda saves the most infuriating insults for Tetsuo, the roughest play for his oldest friend. Tetsuo can handle it after all. 

Even though he won’t admit it aloud, ever, he missed this.

(He would miss this.)

After a while they finally settle down on the mattress, move onto less boisterous play and into casual conversation, “So was your nurse hot or not? It’s an important questions, Tets, trust me”, and Kaneda’s breathing gradually evens out as Tetsuo’s head stops pulsing in time with his fast heartbeat. Tetsuo glances at Kaneda out of his peripheral after a long stretch of silence between them. His eyes are closed and his face relaxed.

Their legs are still intertwined.

Tetsuo winds up staring at the ceiling again for what feels like hours. Occasionally he glances over at Kaneda, just to make sure he’s still there, and watches him sleep. Wishing, like always, that he could follow.

He tries to relax and let sleep take him, but doesn’t like where he goes when he closes his eyes, doesn’t feel quite right enough to fall asleep yet. But with Kaneda snoring softly by his side and strange images occasionally popping into his head, at least he’s no longer bored.

Tetsuo is eventually lulled asleep by the thrum of a heartbeat in his head, not entirely sure if it’s his own.